Paleocrity

paleo diet.jpg

The paleo diet/lifestyle is based on nothing but the same hot air that keeps the great and spacious building afloat...for now. Do you remember the first time you ever heard someone explain to you that they were doing the paleo diet? And they, therefore, were going to cut out entire food groups such as dairy and grains? And that it was because that is how our bodies were designed to function at peak performance because our lean, buff ancestors back in the Paleolithic period used to eat that way? I don’t know about you, but my first reaction was to say, “Uh, our ancestors were WHO?! I don’t think so.”

I really didn’t think this post would be a necessary contribution to LDS recorded thought, until I did some poking around and was disturbed to discover that Brigham Young University offers classes on Evolutionary Biology. Huh??? My mind drifted back in time to the California junior high teacher who made us watch a 2 hour film dramatizing the nonverbal lives of a Neanderthal male and female, caked in mud (because they were obviously smart enough to understand it would protect them from the damaging UV rays of the sun).

Do we understand that the number of fossils scientists claim date older than 10,000 years could fit in a space the size of a porta-potty? Do we realize that several of the finds have been quietly recanted as errors? Here are some examples: 

- “The Piltdown Man” is a fossil supposedly found in the Piltdown gravel pits in East Sussex and was enthusiastically received as the missing evolutionary link between ape and modern man and was then displayed in the Natural History Museum of London for 40 years. It was exposed in 1953 as a forgery - the altered mandible and teeth of an orangutan paired with the cranium of a hundreds of years old man with an abnormally small brain. 

A 1915 portrait of scientists analyzing the Piltdown fossil. Note the picture of Charles Darwin on the wall in the background. 

A 1915 portrait of scientists analyzing the Piltdown fossil. Note the picture of Charles Darwin on the wall in the background. 

- “The Nebraska Man” was a figment of science’s imagination based on the discovery of a single tooth which turned out to be from an extinct pig. But before the remainder of the pig was excavated, Scientists had already been busy at work creating an elaborate museum display with pictures of what they envisioned Nebraska Man’s body would look like. They even gave him a family. 

nebraska man.jpg

-  The Neanderthals of Europe? Bits and pieces of humans from the Middle Ages, according to one recent study, here.

Note to the science community: your radiocarbon dating system is essentially the equivalent of reading the tea leaves. 

How can we trust the same natural history professionals that as good as buried the mound builders of North America (Smithsonian, I'm looking at you)? Why do you think the Nephite prophets had to work so hard to keep their records safe, burying them up in designated locations? Why do you think angels had to be given charge over them? It's because Satan has always sought to destroy the true records by inspiring his servants to alter them. 

Scientists: I don’t trust you. But do you want to know who I do trust? Pretty much just God. There are at least a few uncorrupted sources of information that are safe for me to draw from: unaltered scripture, living prophets and the Holy Ghost. All three of these tell me that the race of man, on this earth, began with Adam and Eve. How did they eat? Well...after their fall from a terrestrial to a telestial state, they sure ate grains! And their righteous posterity were keepers of animals, useful for milk, meat, eggs, fat, bones (hello, broth), clothing, etc. Did they "eat clean?" You betcha! Did they use Dicamba genetically altered seeds from Monsanto? Not on Adam's watch. Did they eat a bunch of meat? Maybe sometimes, I dunno. I bet it just depended. 

Scriptures indicate that the only hunters and gatherers were the more idle part of the people (picture Lamanites). Everyone else was growing crops and keeping animals. That's how OUR ancestors did things, and they lived to tell about it. So, PALEO, you're up in classroom 301 on the opposite side of the great and spacious building's nutrition department as VEGAN. If you want to move into a classroom with an actual foundation, try Fasting 101. 

What say ye?